Mar 30, 2003
got me a ride and a reason to ignore you
ok tell me if this makes sense: we went to dennys on friday for eric's birthday. including me and eric, there were 12 people at the table. we left a $15 tip.... $10 of that was from me. asscrap.
posted by sarah 7:46 PM
Mar 23, 2003
we dont need no thought control
spring is without a doubt, the most pleasant time to be outside. even when its raining, everything is till so fresh and clean. i had a nice weekend. no work on friday so i stayed in bowie and walked around with matt. :-) then on saturday katie and her mom came and picked me up and we went shopping. later in the day me, katie, eric, bryan, and emily went to crofton and played mini golf. i hit the ball too hard once and it bounced over the fence into the parking lot and hit a car. i didnt mind though, it was a civic. we went into the batting cages and i cant hit a ball worth crap. umm... later that night a whole bunch of people (me, eric, katie, kevin, matt, ashley, gordon, travis, sean, geoff, elsie, rob, and bryan) came over and watched barbershop and eat hamburgers and pizza. today i went to this orientation thing with eric and my dad in dc for ohio university. i dont want eric to go to college. i'll be bored. tomorrow i'm getting my hair chopped off so i'll be nice and pretty.
posted by sarah 9:21 PM
Mar 20, 2003
we see paradise and put up a parking lot
i saw the worst thing on tv today. the newscaster on fox was talking about the war and then he said "stay brave. stay strong. stay with fox." i swear, using a war to advertise. and then uh coca cola company arranged all the bodies of dead civilians to spell "drink coke" so the F-117777s had something to look at just before they dropped bombs. and as iraqi citizens tried to run across the border into jordan's refugee camps, dodging minefields and air raids, one pulled out a pack of mentos and smiled into the camera. i love it though. the little news tickers at the bottom of the screen saying "hundreds of people arrested for protesting." thats great. and then the explanation that they were getting too violent. that makes a lot of sense, to arrest protestors for being too violent while we simutaneously drop bombs on crowded cities. rarr.
posted by sarah 9:54 PM
Mar 19, 2003
i need more time.
posted by sarah 10:46 PM
bombs over baghdad
the war just started. i'm sitting in my cushy chair in my family room watching blank skies on fox, while i'm sure others are running for their lives. sigh... what world is this?
posted by sarah 10:01 PM
Mar 17, 2003
we pass the time to forget how time passes
what a horrible weekend. i got in this huge fight with my dad on saturday complete with yelling, screaming, slamming doors, crying, etc etc. he's so dumb. the lowest grade i have right now is a B and he said i cant do anything until i bring my grades up. so after some yelling and screaming he apologized and promised not to be such a psycho about my grades anymore. so blah. bad weekend. and i forgot to wear green today so i got pinched so much and now i have a purple spot on my arm. but yeah, today was fun. hit matt! :-)
posted by sarah 7:46 PM
Mar 15, 2003
"And this, too, shall pass away."
there's this story that abe lincoln once told about some eastern monarch who asked some of his wise men to think of a sentence that could be posted anywhere, at any time and still be true. after thinking about it they came up with "And this, too, shall pass away." I like that, knowing that everything is fleeting and will deteriorate and be forgotten. it makes me feel very small. but in the same way, connected to everything and everyone. so in an act of boredom i wrote that quote on every bill that was in my pocket. my plan is to do this with every bill i have just to see if maybe some day i get one of them back.
bedknobs & broomsticks is one of my favorite movies of all time. they really dont make children's movies like they used to. the crap we watch with our kids at work that has no emotion at all. we wouldnt want to upset the kids of course. sheltering them is so much healthier.
idiots.
i like this painting. she looks very strong but at the same time beautiful. and this painting proves that nudity is not smut.
posted by sarah 12:42 AM
Mar 8, 2003
each day a reminder of what it takes / each day a reminder of my mistakes
i dont want to live here anymore. my dad is insane. seriously, he's fucking nuts. i'm on restriction because my grades dropped from a 4.0 to a 3.83. i'm not allowed to hang out with my friends anymore because according to him they're losers. and me and eric couldnt go to the show at matt's tonight because matt "looks like he crawled out from under a rock" and he's a loser. fuck you dad. you dont know my friends at all. and my dad's implying that i'm some sort of a tramp. always telling me to change because a tshirt and jeans is trampy. fucking flip flops are too revealing. fuck! i am going out of my mind trying to please you! i try to be a good person. i have never drinken, done drugs, or smoked. ever. i am such a prude, you have no idea. i work my ass off to get good grades. but its never good enough. thats all i get, a constant reminder from a drunken asshole that i will never be good enough. the fact that my father could only love me if i had a 4.0. and not even then, because i am still a disappointment. i'm sick of this. i want to leave. not a day goes by that i dont think about ways that i could get away. i have over $1100 in the bank but i cant access any of it without my mom's signature until i'm 16. thats not too far away though, only a month. but i'd have nowhere to go. and i dont have the balls to do any of it. i'll just sit here and be controlled until i graduate. i want my mom to come home. i want to be able to be myself. damn it. i cant even decide my own religion. i cant even pick my own friends. i cant even dskjf
/
posted by sarah 9:49 PM
Mar 7, 2003
she died with poetic timing
this is a poem by henry rollins. its so vulgar but its almost sweet.
when she comes:
she pulls you close
she breathes in short bursts
her eyes close
her head tilts back
her mouth opens slightly
her thighs turn to steel and then melt
she is perfect
and you feel like you are everything.
how great would that be to have a poem like that written about you? here's another for the masses:
the baby was born. a girl. she had her father's nose and cheekbones. her mother's high forehead and eyes. she had her father's knife scars and her mother's track marks.
goodnight.
posted by sarah 11:42 PM
Mar 2, 2003
turn dial to raise product, apply thin, even layer to underarm
i erased all of last night's 6am nonsense. the jist of it was; i am in a rut. so lately i've been all blah and bleh. but this morning i saw the snow melting and plants sprouting and i remembered that spring is almost here. and soon there will be daffodils. and warm days. and fun. and hope. and. and i feel better.
posted by sarah 6:06 AM
Mar 1, 2003
dominated
the majority rule show was pretty fun. majority rule and mannequin were great. i missed the first 2 bands. darkest hour was fun. i got my tarot cards read by this guy who was kind of drunk. some of what he said was very accurate but some of it was just kind of blah. but he did say the path i am on is going to cause me to lose all my wealth. damn. baahbfbds! yesterday i put two checks in my account and now i have over a thousand dollars!!! !!!!!!! i'm happy. avbhhfvhfb bah. show tonight in mt rainer. fun fun. thsee sites are fun:
bang bang bang
homestarrunner
makes no sense at all - http://yoga.tripod.co.jp/flash/kikkomaso.swf
there are others but............ i'm tired.
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posted by sarah 4:55 PM
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"there is within me, and with sadness i have watched it in others, a knot of cruelty borne by the stream of love."
Past
current
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