May 20, 2002
pineapple soda = 53 grams of sugar = makes me sick
bleg! pineapple soda is so good. i was drinking one at lunch today. i had drinken about half of it when i glanced at the nutrition facts and saw that it had 53 grams of sugar! thats too much! so i poured out the rest. but in 5th period my tummy started hurting really bad and i thought i was going to puke or pass out or something. i just wanted to curl up somewhere and die. when that class ended i walked really slowly down the hall and then went into the bathroom for a while because i thought i was going to puke. i didnt and i started to feel better so i went to my next class. i was about 10 minutes late. the teacher didnt notice though.
this thing has gotten a lot less personal and more of me just stating random tidbits from my day or being very discreet about arguments with people. forget all that. i cried today. only for a few seconds but i still did. i was thinking about saying something to my dad about his drinking. ("when was the last time you went a whole day without any alcohol? you do realize this is destroying yourself and your family") but then i saw him and he had this look on his face. i dont know how to describe it. i just felt so bad for him. i just felt that this is all that life has to offer him. that glass of wine in his hand is all he has. that bottle of beer is his high point. its all he has to look forward to. i couldnt take that thought so i went downstairs and just started crying. i confuse myself whenever i cry, i dont like the way i feel.
posted by sarah 10:42 PM
