Jan 6, 2002
laughing. crying. screaming.
every night i die and every morning i am born again. i wake up and pick up the words that i threw around the night before. my room is a mess. my life is a mess. i like it that way. i'm sitting here, eating peanutbutter-chocolate chip cookies and trying to decide what i'm feeling. i'm either depressed or content. the battle has yet to be won so i'll give everyone a view of both.
my mom woke me up at about 1. i was tired and wanted to sleep longer. but i knew if i didnt go upstairs she would keep coming in to wake me up every few minutes. i got out of bed and tripped over one of my shoes and fell flat on my face. that hurt. i went upstairs and ate some food and then got online for awhile. actually, i cant really remember what i did today. it's all become blurred into every other day. what a waste. today has been this grey, cold, rainy day. i was hoping for snow but i'm not surprised we got this awful sleet or whatever it is. the sky is shitting on my once beautiful world. i'm alone and miserable. someone pass me a gun.
on the other hand...
instead of sleeping my day away i actually woke up a few hours earlier than i would have. i tripped over a shoe in the morning but it motivated me to straighten up my room a little. i had a nice day of pretty much doing nothing. which is nice since the next 5 days will be me getting no sleep and having to do a lot of work which i'd rather not do. i had hoped for snow but i guess this freezing rain is fine. the wetness combined with the cold will ensure a 2-hour delay tomorrow which is great. i like sleeping in. the end of a weekend is the beginning of a new week. tomorrow could be great. since we'll most likely have school i'll be able to get out of the house and see friends and i won't have to wake up early. yeah, today was nice. i'm happy.
both paragraphs are true. today was the worst/best day of my life.
song: porphyria ~ AFI
posted by sarah 9:32 PM
